Childless or struggling to have kids, and in a relationship? This blog is for you

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash Two hands hold a heart cut out of paper

Being childless is hard.

Wanting and trying to have children and struggling for any reason is hard.

Being in relationships is hard.

And when all of these come at once, these difficulties can be multiplied.


You might notice that:

 

·        You are in a different place on the timeline of processing or grieving your experiences to your partner or partners

·        Your partner/s may not seem to be grieving at all

·        Your partner/s may be childfree or already a parent and therefore be struggling to understand what you are going through – you have to grieve alone (I’ve been there and it hurt a lot)

·        You may be finding step-parenting hard because you’re not allowed to parent the children or you feel sidelined

·        Sex may have become functional or be non-existent and you don’t know how to make it relational, fun, connecting or erotic again

·        You and your partner/s have such different family of origin and/or relationship histories and experiences, with such very different impacts, worldviews and meanings that you feel very far apart and don’t know how to come back together

·        You and your partner/s may have different neurotypes

·        Your relationship may have ended or be about to end, or you’re scared that this may happen

·        One of you is experiencing pain, grief and loss more intensely than the other or others and they feel helpless and don’t know how to help

·        You are aware of powerful feelings and states such as disconnect, anger, regret, guilt, shame, envy, a lack of understanding, even hatred at times

·        One or both/all of you feels very alone, unseen or unheard in the relationship

·        You don’t know how to make it better, or if you even can

 

I’m here, as a childless therapist and counsellor, to help you:

 

·        Talk and listen to each other in a held and safe space, no matter how powerful your emotions are

·        Grow your empathy and knowledge of your partner’s/partners’ needs, feelings, backgrounds, influences and experiences

·        Have brave, honest, difficult conversations with support

·        Find your own path back to healing and to a healthy relationship

·        Find practical ways to reconnect, and rebuild your intimacy

·       By bringing my practical and personal expertise and experience

·       Navigate out of your relationship safely and carefully if this is where you are at, so there is nothing left unsaid that needs to be said

·        Listen to you both or you all to craft exactly the right therapy for you

 

If any of this speaks to you, then please do get in touch for a free and no obligation discovery call, whether this is for one of you, or both/all of you. You’ll be speaking to a compassionate, creative, practical and inclusive relationship counsellor and therapust, who works with all identities, all relationship patterns and all neurodiversities in Lewes (East Sussex) and online.

Contact me